The re-growth of my conscience

Maybe its church, maybe its just me growing up but my conscience has really grown back. Now I know that your conscience can't ever really die, but you definitely stop listening to that little voice after a while. Well as I said before, mines is back and that little voice is chirping in my ear ALOT. Its what causes this constant introspective mood that I be all the time, which is all good....I guess.

These days I feel really small, I'm just a normal guy out there trying to make it like everyone else. My issues seems really small when I compare them to other peoples, let alone when I start comparing them to the issues of the world. My most serious issue is the debate to figure out what I'm going to where at some events this weekend...or weather I should even be going (Meyerhoff weekend).

However my conscience has really got me thinking about bigger things these days. I had my issues with the program (well more so they had issues with me) but thats in the past. I'm older, wiser and content with myself and my decisions...despite what they think about them. I must remember that the program is full of people just like me. Some of them made mistakes in dealing with me and I probably made some as well....so I'm letting it go. The program does lots of good, for lots of people. Honestly even with all the trouble it caused me, it did do some good and I do appreciate that.

There's going to be tons of people at this event that I don't wanna see and haven't seen in years but thats not why I'm going. I'm going to support the program, despite my disagreements in the past with the staff. I'm just one of those kids (head strong I guess) that had to find his own way in some respects. If the program can do this much good for people including me then I gotta support.

I do all this talking about change and growth.....blah blah blah. So I think its funny that this event just happens to occur this year. If it had occurred last year...would I have even gone? Probably not...and I would have regretted it.

I believe in change



I found this video on a friends myspace page, for some reason it really hit home with me. Maybe its because I left church this morning with a I can do anything attitude, who knows.

It probably has more so to with the fact that I'm all grown up now (well maybe close) and I'm starting to feel the bug of social responsibility. Hopefully I'll be able to put to some sort of productive purpose. Ideas??

Or maybe I'm just tired of talking about all the superficial things in life all day long! You'd really be surprised how much time people spend focused on things that don't matter...myself included.

This is our america, my america, your america.........so maybe we should start giving a damn about it and spend less time on our myspace pages :-/

I guess only time will tell what comes of this thought......

Day 26 / Danity Kane

So I know there's some folks out there seriously calling me wack for this but I don't care. The Day 26 album was really good. Whatever puffy did he did a good job....I didn't even watch "Making the Band" but Day 26 and Danity Kane both made pretty damn descent CD's.

But which is better??? Not quite sure about that one yet.

My Budget

So I keep a pretty detailed budget, I like to think of it more of a financial management system.

I call it CASh or Chris's Assest Spread-Sheet...hehe.

I've been keeping my budgets since like 2003 and I happened to just be looking back at what my old budget used to look like and wow I was shocked. I now make in one pay check more than I made for a whole month of my budget in 2003.

Now thats growth.

Judge Judy


I have to say I'm a real fan of judge judy. There's just something about
her style in judging...she's got serious swaggar!

I also like that she has such a decisive sense of right and wrong, seperating liars from the honest. That level of judgement probably aint perfect but she's darn good I swear.

It probably only comes from years
and years of experience seeing the fools that come in her court but damn
I'm jealous.


ps. If you wondering where the heck this came from...I was in the barber shop watching it while I was waiting for Marcus to cut my hair. Yes thats right I was waiting but I don't mind Marcus is cool peeps.

Sidenote: Look at judge judy looking hot, she can try my case!

The Other Blog / Friday

So I'm slightly cheating on this blog....lol. I started another one link after having a conversation last night that kinda pointed out some flaws in the way we all pick a mate....or at least some concerns. I said a few days ago that I was going to start taking "dating" seriously instead of just toying around with it like I have been. So this blog is an attempt to kinda understand some things about what I want in a mate....

So on other news its Friday and I just recently got the Day 26 album and I have got to say that I really really like it so far. I really love music if you couldn't already tell so finding a new "good" CD is almost as good as sex.....ok not really at all but you get the point, I like music.

As of lately I've really been working on building myself up while enjoying life as I go. So my posts as of lately have really bee on a lighter and sillier level. I've just been happier these days then I think I have been since I was a kid, honestly I forgot what being really happy felt like...so it feels good. Plus there's no drama going on with me right now and I'm staying outta the "lime-light" and outta trouble. I'm living right, acting right and tryna enjoy it!!

Hopefully its nice this weekend, but either way enjoy it guys!

Random Pics of the Day


Just random pictures of me on my way to and from class.

Everything Happens For a Reason

The title truly says it all!! I'm such a believe, nothing is random...everything and I mean everything happens for a reason.

I stole this from my friends MySpace, its what inspired this blog so I had to post it.

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they're right, you believe less so you can eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

Apparently it was written by Marilyn Monroe....I wasn't aware she did anything except sing and look cute...perhaps I was wrong.

New Delta In-flight Saftey Video

Delta Airlines is trying to get more folks to pay attention to the safety video we've all seen a 1000 times.

The Peace an Quiet of 2008

So in a few of my routine conversations today I found myself constantly on the topic of the drama and ridiculousness which has become the life of......two people I know. Sorry if you were expecting names can't be putting folks on blast in the blog...thats against the rules.

So during the course of both of these conversations I realized that my life has been pretty darn quiet all year long. I like to think this is all my doing however I know better. The lord has been telling me how to get my life together for a long time and like a lot of folks I wasn't listening. However, I'm thankful he finally made me listen, it required a kick in the butt but I still thank him every Sunday for it. I'm even more thankful when I hear about the ridiculousness going on in the lives of some folks around me. NOTE: Please notice I did not call these people friends as neither are their associates at best....and one is probably a borderline enemy.

At such a time I really think its important to kinda step back and recognize what things are causing this period of peace...that way "new" things don't come along and mess them up.

I'm a firm believer that strong swords (and people) are forged in fire....but that doesn't mean go start one. However this is exactly what I think the two people I mentioned earlier have been doing. I did a post a while back on liars...see the link here. I mean don't get me wrong, everyone lies but I really believe that somebody who you find lying all the damn time.....is just somebody you should stay away from. At the very least you should establish some distance...because trust troubles 'a' coming their away. If I were to give this phenomena a name I'd call it "The Mark of a Liar" its almost like a big danger sign posted on their forehead....however some of us fail to take notice. So at this point you might be saying something like "what difference does their lying make to me". However the thing we fail to realize (and that I've seen way to many times) is that when liars take that eventual "death spiral" after their pile of lies catch up with them they spew hate and chaos in all directions. So take notice and step back.

Fat Mariah


My boi D was talking about Mariah's new diet so it made me think of this clearly photoshop'd album cover of hers.

Enjoy!

A Case of the Mondays


So today I seriously had a case of the Mondays!!!

I didn't feel like doing anything, like nothing.

I got myself to work but I was dragging myself in there...I almost called out. Then to make the day even worse, I had to go to the gym after work.....and it hurt!

So I'm not going to write much today but hopefully the week gets better.

Happy Easter

Ok, so todays blog won't be long at all. I did a hell of a lot of blogging yesterday and have no intention of doing much today.

I had a really great easter. I went to church, hung out with lots of folks I wanted to see and probably gained at least 5 lbs. Hehe, oh well I'll work it off tomorrow.

J will be back soon, so I'm glad for that.

Last week was spring break, so hopefully this week won't be to painful. Its gonna hurt getting back into the swing of things.

An Album That Shocked Me

So if you know me, you've got to know I'm a music WHORE!!!! I love music, been like this for as long as I can remember. So by this stage in my life and with music today as it is, its a real treat when an album shocks me.

I heard about the new Danity Kane album from my boy D and I was really surprised. Who woulda thought these wack ass girls (sorry) could make a descent album.

My boy says their first album was ok too but hey.....one shock at a time please.


Thanks
~Management

ps. Not to be all on the balls of "puffy's" (or whatever his name is now) groups but I like the new joint by the boy group too "Day 26 - Got me Going". But I see Mario Winans all over it....sounds just like a song he made before.

Maybe Its Time to Get Serious

I don't really have too much on my mind this fine afternoon. Its really pretty outside and its got me thinking of.......yep you guessed it SUMMER! So maybe its time I thought about seriously investigating a relationship....seriously.

Honestly for the last year and a half I don't really think I've taken any "relationship" I engaged myself in seriously. Honestly I had bigger things on my mind and it just couldn't make anyone a priority in my life. Having known this, most folks would have probably just told me to chill out...and no go seeing anyone. However thats not what I wanted to do, I needed the confidence boost that comes along with being able to pull anybody I wanted. I sound real vain there...not my intent just being honest. However, these days the "attention" just doesn't have the attraction that it once did.

A friend of mines predicted this very day.....the day I'd get sick of all the attention. Well I guess they were right, cuz now I'm sick of it. The number of times I've been "out" this year probably equals to my club activities of a month in 2007. So I'm taking this change to mean that I'm finally ready to actually serious invest myself in another person.

Well see how this goes, let the process begin.

Sidenote: Can't wait til J gets back.....damn her for leaving and not taking me with her.

Tinkering with my Blog Template

So I'm messing around with the template for this blog. Hopefully I can get the width of the posting space to be a bit wider....not sure why its so narrow in the template. Hopefully I can "fix" it without breaking the whole thing.

We'll see.

So much going on...

The title truly says it all.....there's soooo much going on right now. Its almost like I see the world I live in change right before my eyes!

I see change everywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nearly every person I know is undergoing some sort of life change/transformation...maybe its just what goes on at our age, who knows. Although change is a constant I like to think my "transformation period" ended January 1, 2008....but what do I know. I might be right, maybe I'm wrong. The really odd thing about the changes I see is that their all good (or at least I think their all for the better). I see people in my life truly growing and I have to admit I'm impressed....were some soldiers!! Cuz we be going through it sometimes and it barely causes a dent!

With all this change going on I feel as thow I must drop a piece of knowledge that kinda guided my decisions for most of my life.

I've never been a believer in the impossible....those that tell you some things are impossible are haters! I dare you to dream. When someone tells you they think something is impossible what their really saying is...."I don't see how you could do that". So while that might be a true statement it doesn't change the fact that I'm going to try. Maybe you don't see how I could do something....that doesn't mean I can't. I'm sure the folks that lived before electricity thought computers were impossible too. They just couldn't see such a thing being possible.

So again...I dare you to dream!

I've had lots of people tell me lots of things weren't possible (this list includes friends, family, parents, you name it!) and after I achieve them I'm sure it burns them up a little. Some of them probably still can't understand how I did it.....but maybe its not for them to understand. Let my life be limited by what God wants me to do with it...and no one else.

I'm here for a purpose...and I'm trying to make it happen.

Yummy

So recently I've been feeling extra "yummy"! For an explanation on the yummy concept see link. I'd like to say its because of the jill scott concert...but its not I was feeling yummy way before that but it was a nice boost.

Hopefully the yummy-ness will continue but for once I'm pretty sure that it will. Maybe more details later...got a lot I gotta do today.

SPAM!!!!


I hate SPAM, so much that I'm going to dedicated a whole blog message of the day too it. So like most other folks, I have gobs of emails! But over the years I've forwarded most of them to GMail. However I do still have a hotmail account that does nothing but collect SPAM! I switched to gmail mainly cuz it was cool (I mean its Google, duh!) but the other reason was their SPAM filter is just fantastic! However, even google isn't perfect so over time I guess the spammers are getting smarter cuz more and more SPAM is getting through the mighty GMail filter, but its still doing a descent job so no worries.

I personally just find the whole thing pointless, why generated this much wasteful email when 90% of it is just going get directed to the GMail spam folder (which now contains a whopping 680 messages!!).

I was reading up on SPAM today for some school work and found the best site on the topic, which reported that 82.5% of all the worlds email is SPAM. They even have a map of the world showing where all the SPAM is going....and of course the US is #1. The sites below if your interested.
http://www.marshal.com/trace/

So maybe email wasn't such a good idea.

My Issue Management System

So I must admit that since late last year I've had a secret weapon in my battle against the forces that were bring me down....hehe.

Nawh but seriously I did read this book last year called "On Bullshit" (no lie, thats really the title) and it sparked the concept for how I deal with "Issues" today, which is the topic of the blog for today. The book is very very good, and talks about Bullshit and those who use it...which is most of humanity. A friend of mines suggested the book after hearing one of my rants about the bullshit I was receiving on a daily basis...from some folks.

I like to call my "Issue Management System", RFR (Respond, Feel and Reflect). Basically when an "Issue" occurs just give yourself a second (sometimes this requires that you step out the situation) and develop a response. Then after you know what your going to do then let the flood of emotions hit you. Most of the time after you've given yourself a second to think about things the isn't much emotion left.......but sometimes this ain't the case. So a little yelling..or whatever....is necessary, but since you've already worked out your response its not overly emotion or affected by the fight your having as you "Feel". Then after the fact "Reflect", this is the part most of us to all to well. We usually go and tell somebody about the drama we just encountered and give the situation a little more thought.

Its pretty simple when you think about it. However, sometimes I found myself reacting in an emotional fashion which caused my skewed decision making process to cause me to over-react greatly so a system was necessary. As folks say there's no need to use a nail gun to hang shit on your wall...a hammer works just fine.

Sidenote: Went to the gym...as scheduled today and it hurt like a bitch!!!! I mean its good that I'm stepping up the weight and such but damn! I feel like I'm 60 years old and I'm about to lay in the bed and pass the hell out! I never go to bed this early....oh well :-(
I wish I had somebody to rub me right now....maybe I will soon ;-)

Palm Sunday and the Rat Race


So not sure if I've mentioned this in my blog already or not but another of the new years resolutions was to go back to church and I did. I really feel good about going, church is something that has been missing from my existence for a really really long time partly because I used to work on Sunday...but maybe that was just an excuse. Anyways I'm glad its making a comeback.

So probably me and every other person on earth always feels like the pastor's sermon is directly aimed at them and again this is how I felt today. Today's Palm Sunday so of course the pastor was discussing the Sabbath day in detail.........if Nichova had visited my church today, she would have burst into flames because I'm sure they wouldn't have agreed on a single thing. However, I thought it was a real good sermon, I actually told him so. The part I really like was his half hour rant about the rat race. We all know "the rat race" and honestly most of us were either/or currently are major players. One major issue with the rat race is even if you win....your still a rat, or so says the pastor. I'm pretty sure I've heard this quote before but it never really hit home until today. I've been working like a slave for most of my adult life 2 or 3 jobs plus school are really more the norm to me...and last year I started to just think that was a little sad. That caused me to develop the "quit you part time jobs" new years resolution, and I think that was one of the most positive steps I ever made. I was seriously a major player in the rat race....but no longer. On Sunday I'm resting, the world will start to change on Monday (hehe, my first religious joke).

Shot out to the church FBC Crofton link.

Ms. Jill Scott.......a wonderful experience

Faith without effort is fruitless........

Just one of the words of wisdom dropped on my by Ms. Jill Scott, I'm sure somebody else said it before but it couldn't be more true. The concert was dynamic, insightful and a truly classy experience in Constitution Hall. I'm glad I could take part. I'm sure her concert was
great in every city, but I'm sure it was classier in D.C. :-)

Big Props to Jill.

ps. The show had the most amazing lightening....am I the only one that noticed that?

So I'm going to continue "Living my life like its golden".....

Those Damn Lil Bitches....HeHe

So this blog is not at all what you think it is, I decided to start my Friday off on a light note.

Oh btw, HAPPY FRIDAY!!

So I was walking my two ladies this morning (thats right Carmen and Crystal) and this lil ass dog (which I referred to as a lil bitch earlier) has gotten out of his backyard and is running along the running trails of the neighborhood. Even when the dog hasn't gotten out, I can usually here him yapping from his backyard. I hate little dogs!!!!! Their bark is soo annoying......yap yap yap!!! I really wish I could post am mp3, you'd totally understand. Now don't get me wrong lil dogs are cute and great, some you can even put in your pocket...but the bark be killing me! So I know it kills my dogs.

I like to think I've done a really good job raising my two ladies. It was absolute hell when they were puppies but I think I've trained them to be very polite, classy young lady dogs. I know your probably like he's talking about dogs right? Hehe. My dogs are great thow, they don't even bark on the regular. Now occasionally at the dog park they'll bark but I know when I hear that some dog is about to get his ass whooped...cuz their getting pissed off. So I must only imagine what goes through their heads when these lil ass dogs be barking at them. I'm actually shocked and quite proud of their response, they don't even bark back. The just kinda chilled and walked right on past the loud lil bitch. Personally when somebody yells at me I'm whooping some ass or at least dishing out a verbal lashing. For real, you bet not even raise your voice.

So maybe I should take a lesson from my ladies. Maybe its best to not be so quick to bark back......on second thought never mind, I'm still whooping some ass.

A lite post for what is about to hopefully be great weekend! Hopefully you enjoy yours too!

Fat Smash Report

I know its been a while since I did my last report on my fight against the fat.

However, don't think I haven't been on top of things...because I have. I have been quite faithful to the gym activities, and my original schedule has been holding up all year. I even added an additional day to try and step up the progress...I'm greedy.

As for my weight.....I'm just going to stop reporting on it. I've been hovering around 161 for the past few weeks, so I'm guessing this is all the weight I'm going to loose. This kinda make sense, since I'm 5'11 and lowest weight I ever remember was 155. So I guess I'm more concerned about how I look and not my actual weight.

As for how the body looks...I wanted to be at a point where I could post some sort of pic w/o making my blog rated 'R'. However on second thought I think that's kinda too much information for the blog. So you can just see me for pictures, lol. My arms are getting bigger and I actually have a chest now......as for the stomach, its flat but not sign of abs yet.

The quest for abs continues.....

Flirting from the "Learkers"

So I'm doing the blog a little late today.....I didn't have a moment all day to do it not even via my mobile wireless device.

But I wanted to do a blog...but I didn't have a topic at all. That was until I received two text messages from people that I have to classify as "learkers".

I'm sure by this point your wondering what a learker is...I'll explain. A learker is someone that maybe you talked to for a brief period and just kinda feel off because of disinterest or in the more dangerous case its some one that you actually talked to and then dropped like a bad habit for good reason. We might encounter the learker occasionally and most of us remember why we broke things off but for some reason (I don't claim to know why) they keep trying to talk to you.

Now, don't get things twisted. If you think I'm being arrogant by claiming I have learkers.....I'm not. I'm just explaining another one of life's phenomena. Damn, I've even been a learker myself....there I admit it!

So now that we understand the "learker phenomena", I received a text from two of mines tonight. Almost like they had staged some sort of learker attack against me..lol. A friend of mines encountered one of her learkers today as well....well more precisely her mom brought him to her attention. So it maybe be want to comment on the topic.

I get very uneasy when I have contact with someone from the learker category. J would say its because I'm a sucker for attention. I admit it I am, especially when I'm bored or in need of a break! However despite my immediate needs for attention I really try my best to not let my selfishness cause me to take advantage of a learker.

To be honest, even speaking with some of them....is playing with fire and I left my fire proof gloves back in 2007.

My Thought Today.....Black History Month

I'm sitting here enjoying the Black History Month
Presentation/Performance at my godchilds school. I have to say its
actually pretty good....I wonder if mines were this good when I was
younger. I admit they got the parents..and me...with their lil songs.

I was inspirired by one of the quotes memorized by students...so its my
thought of the day.

Your not here for yourself your here to open doors for others.
~Nicki Giovani

I might have totally mispelled her name, but its a very true statement.
LOL

My Friends.....a moment to reflect.

So I'm sitting here listening to recent Mary J Blige CD - Growing Pains and I'm actaully kinda feeling it. This one song I'm listening too currently entitled "Stay Down" reminds me of the folks I have in my life. This blog is to thank them for their continued membership and support to my...."Inner Circle".

I'm actually starting to get a lil cold, however its my own fault, I hung around my boi who clearly warned me that he had a cold. However, I'm not sweating it. I went to work today at a descent hour and after a call from Nichova decided that I wasn't going to my pointless class today. I'm usually not one to ever miss class, but this class is seriously pointless. I decided to take this evening to clear my head and take a breather. For once I was "good", I did school work ALL weekend, I don't have a serious task (school wise) until next week. It was challenge, but I did it and today is my reward.

I took the day to truly reflect and relax. I had wonderful date with my buddy Nichova yesterday and it left me in an introspective mood. However it was today, when I was crashing over Jelli's house.....just doing some long overdue chilling with my girl that I realized some things....

Church teaches us to know and believe in God's plan. However its moments like these that I know and honestly believe that everything happens for a reason. I feel like I've seriously grown as a person over the past year, I can't even describe the fire that I've felt like I was walking through sometimes. However its that fire that leaves me at this point in my life.....feeling like a butterfly thats emerging from his cocoon.

So I'd like to thank everyone in my life that I spent a great deal of time leaning on in some way or another while I was undergoing some needed reconstruction in the last year. Like Mary said "Thanks for Staying Down". Hopefully one day I can return the favor......yall know who you are.

Another Life Concept....The Performance Review

So my thought of the day is really the explanation of a concept I have about life in general and all things a life includes. You could apply it to people, relationships or friends however what brought it to my mind is careers.

So when your working, your constantly judged and you have your performance measured and analyzed on a constant basis. Although some might see this as fowl, I honestly feel like its a good thing.

However rarely do I see people apply the same methodology to their own lives!

Why should your job just be evaluating you, I firmly believe that you should also routinely return the favor (remember this goes for people, relationships and friends as well....the parallels are so clear)! So when its time for that yearly (or whatever schedule your own) evaluation, return the favor and see how your job is holding up against the jobs your friends or other jobs you know you could get...you get the point.

The point is that evaluations are important and without them you have no idea weather its really good for you to continue doing something or not. So don't be afraid, give the things in your life a good ole "performance review"....you might be surprised (and encouraged) how many things in your life hold up.

I sure was.

Panera....A Safe Haven from Madness.


Thank goodness for the Panera Bread!

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I get soooo much work done in this lovely place. Not to mention there's free wifi and excellent food.

I got somebody hooked on the Crispani this weekend, I should start getting a commission from Panera!

Another good time at Panera.

Liars

I just absolutely hate people that say "I'm not a liar". A former acquaintance used to say this all the time and someone did today...so my memory was triggered.

Again, were not 6 years old guys. Everyone lies, everyone! I don't care what kinda saint you think you are, but you've lied sometime about
something!!!

What's even funnier, is when you witness one of these people who claim to be non-liars....lie right to your race. Hilarious!!!!

This blog is to call out all those who have lied directly to my face and for whatever reason I let you get away with it. :-)

Some boyz never learn I guess. But the truth always comes out.

Hot Ghetto Mess

So this weekend I ventured to PG county, some of you guys know where I
was...but I won't state it here.

I know PG is ghetto, damn I grew up there, but I've been away for a while and
rarely go back to the not so nice parts. Some would claim there aren't any nice parts.....but their just haters and probably live in MoCo. However I must say that my visit this weekend left your boi in shock. I witnessed some hot ass ghetto mess!

Me and most of my crew however made it out unscaved...however there were some
casualties (both of them were J's).......

R.I.P

  • 1 x gladware container with crab dip remnants, but I don't think she wanted it back after what it went through....lol.
  • 1 x Dip tray....she served us all well.

More hot ghetto mess.....enjoy

Friends

I hate to have my blog be on another serious topic today but I just had to make some comments on the topic of friends...

Comment 1:
First off folks, were 7 years old anymore! Everyone doesn't have to like you! I mean don't get me wrong, you shouldn't be going around just trying to piss people off. However of the course of your life you might do something that some folks might not like.....and thats O.K. Its fine because this is YOUR life, and not everyone else's.....so do with it as you please!

Comment 2:
Secondly not everyone is designed our should be your friend! Everyone's different and because of that fact, not everyone gets along with everyone else. I mean you might be able to cordial with everyone but to actually be everyones friend thats ridiculous!

Comment 3:
Not everyone's good for you!!!!!! Hopefully as you get older (as I am), you start to realize this and start to "weed" those people out or at least distance yourself from them. Some personality types when "meshed" closely with your own just don't work. So you can force it if you like, but your just opening yourself up to drama and trouble.

You've been warned...

My Bodyguard


So I had a horrible dream this morning, I can honestly say it was the worst I've ever had in my life. I thank god for having someone call me this morning and waking me up (I know he did it), cuz the dream was the worst! Honestly this dream could have probably ruined my whole day and probably would have if I kept thinking about it. However, thankfully that didn't happen.

The actual contents of the dream, will not be discussed...so please don't ask. I'll only say that it was a very twisted "more horrible" version of one of the worst moments of my life. The actual event itself, is definitely what triggered my "madness" and my running wild like a kid in 2007 so for me to say the dream was even worse makes it even scarier....

So after I got off the call that rose me from my horrible dream (thank you Night), I was contemplating why in the world would I be dreaming about such a thing. I don't mean to sound mean to sound vain at all...but my life has been going great! Ever since I got my self back together in the later part of 2007 and started talking and listening to the guy upstairs more often my life has returned to the quiet and successful times of years past.

So what the heck could the dream mean? I mean its just a dream so it could honestly mean nothing at all. However I really think that the devil is seriously trying to worm his way back into my life though my weakest points. As I sat there on my bed thinking aimlessly about this darn dream, obviously a little sad and depressed, the bigger of my two dogs carmen (which I like to think of as my bodyguard) jumps her big ass halfway on my bed and plants a big slobbery lick on my face. As gross as it was, it took my mind off the dream so I felt better and as the thoughts of my dream immediately start to fade away I gotta thank my bodyguard for another job well done!

Now looking back at the situation this morning, I realize I was doing EXACTLY what the devil wanted me to do when he put that dream in my head and I fell for it. I'm truly reminded that God is real and working all around me when moments like that this occur. So maybe I have 2 bodyguards ;-)

The Panera Crispani

So this really isn't really a blog...more like an advertisement.

First off, I love panera bread...if you disagree then your absolutely a hater!

Second, you gotta try a crispani the next time you go there.

Why I Hate Black People

So the title is a lil alarming...and while its not quite that serious I'm half way serious. Black folks and probably people in general are sooo damn trife!!

Seriously I'm only commenting on "black" people so heavily b/c the person in my next story is black but I'll continue....

So I'm in the panera bread today trying to eat and get my study on and I'm sitting next to this family of 3 black people. Although panera does have a elegant and restaurant feel...IT IS NOT a restaurant, and you do NOT have a server.

In the course of the 10 minutes I "observed" this black family I witnessed to violations which I think qualify as trife.

Violation 1:
I saw them stop the staff in panera and ask them for some napkins. Although they do have staff to kinda clean up the tables...THEY ARE NOT WAITERS! What do they look like getting you some napkins, next they'd probably ask them for a refill. Its elegant fast food, not a restaurant!

Violation 2:
So the black family has a table full of trash and then they get up and leave....did they take their trash with them to the trash can. Oh course not, I bet they expected their "server" to do it. WTF! The staff ARE NOT BUSS BOYS!

This really made me angry......clearly, but I was also a lil disappointed in "my people".

The Cell Phone Bill is Always Soo Telling...

The title says it all but I'll restate and explain......I had some serious overages in my cell phone plan this month (mainly due to a certain female...who's name I dare not utter). I called in to my "carrier" to inquire about the charges....I mean I know we went over out minutes but the plan was to complain loud enough to get a credit put on my account (which I got). However it was the question of the customer service rep that sparked the topic of this blog.

The rep asked...."Have you had an major changes or moves this month?" and after I replied in a puzzled fashion she explained that normally a spike in overages in a particular month coincides with a major life change/move. Which I guess makes sense, because when stuff happens you get on the phone and talk about. However this got me to thinking about who I've been talking too this month. Despite the fact that I did my usual amount of minutes (somewhere between 450 and 600) I was still curious about who I talked to this month.

So after spending some serious time with my part of the phone bill, I realized it was really telling a story of what was going on with my life in Feb. I admit it was interesting.

So, spend some time with your cell phone bill...maybe you'll be interested too.

Why I'm Up @4am

So...as my post from yesterday gave reference too, I had a take home midterm that I've been diligently working on all weekend because I thought it was due on Tuesday at midnight.

However it seems I should have read my email, because clearly my teacher sent out an email stating that the Tuesday due date was a typo. The actual due date is Wed at midnight.

Can I have these past hours of my life back please :-(

I guess I should stay on top of my email.

I have plenty to say today....

....but I'm drained and have plenty to do so it'll have to wait til tomorrow.

Also my take home midterm is taking me MUCH longer than expected so work tomorrow is very unlikely.

Keep ya posted ;-(

Day 2 of the Strike

So its day 2 of my brains strike...so in an attempt to make my brain happy again I had to treat myself to a few things ;-)

So to mis-quote my favorite artist...the "Notorious B.I.G".....

I'm going, going...back, back to Panera.

I get so much done at that place.

My Mindset Right Now

This song says it all...

Rocko - Umma Do Me

[Lyrics]

You just do you, umma do me .. umma do me .. umma do me
You just do you, umma do me .. umma do me .. umma do me
Wanna see how its done? Then watch me do me, watch me do me, watch me do me
Wanna see how its done? Then watch me do me, watch me do me, watch me do me

My Brain is on Strike


So its Saturday and despite the fact that I have plenty of things I should be doing I'm instead just chilling around the house and finding it very hard to concentrate.

I'm actually having trouble doing anything that required any considerable amount of brain power....its like my brain is on strike.

So maybe a nap is in order. Hopefully my body and my brain resolve their issues soon as I need to get some stuff done ;-)
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